So we had court today. Naturally he showed up with his idiot wife. Why would I expect different?
I went up to speak with CSE (child support enforcement) about the motion to reduce child support. They want to fight it because he was fired and they wanted to combine the two cases into one (first case did not include Bella because he couldn't be bothered to sign her birth certificate).
I have a VERY good idea why he was fired and her fat ass was sitting in on a court bench. Well it's been 6 months since he'd been fired so he had plenty of time to come up with a reason why that I'm sure wasn't even remotely the case. We went up in front of the judge and his reason for getting fired was....
Drumroll please.....
"I got fired because I had a new DM (district manager) and because I couldn't keep my sells up I got fired."
Really?
My idea (which is probably closer to the truth): 1) I hired this chick, made her my assistant manager, got her pregnant, and married her ass while she was still my assistant manager. This is called fraternization and I don't give a shit because I really wanted to hit that, 2) the new DM had a hard on for me and ran another background check or found the first background check and realized I had a deferred prosecution for TWO felony larceny by employee charges. Yeah I did my community service and paid my fines because I'm terrified of jail but I did steal phone cards from the place I worked, or 3) they found out I was stealing again and I got fired.
But alas I have no proof so it does me no good to share my thoughts. I also told them that he wasn't paying child support. They asked him that since he was fired in November, why didn't he show up for the establishment of child support back in January? No answer. You could hear crickets. He had none.
All in all, many hours of my day wasted.. my one day off to spend with my kids and I'm listening to a judge REDUCE the child support from $526 a month for ONE child to $204 a month for TWO children. The CSE workers assured me that it was only temporary and it'll be up for review in 3 months and they'll ask for another judge. I was pissed. Now my girls get deprived even more because he's a loser douchebag who can't keep it in his pants, has two kids with one more on the way, and now he pays even less for child support even though he's NOT PAYING ONE PENNY!
Did I mention I was pissed? Maybe I'll say it again. Maybe not.
The only upside - I got to come home and surprise my girls who were napping and "oh so happy to see me" according to my beautiful Kiera. And I don't feel sorry for his ignorant little wife. I chalked it up to her being so young but no.. she's nothing more than white trailer trash. While we were there she saw a friend of her's that was there on a Show Cause motion (meaning she had to show cause why she wasn't paying child support to her parents who had custody of her kid) and what do you know.. her friend was knocked up too. Shocking right? While we waited for the judge to come in she took the opportunity to sit in front of me and was talking about how to get around child support because she's going to school to be a social worker too. Nice huh... Can't imagine who's been whispering in the douchebag's ear. Total mystery.
Now I'm letting this go because as much as I would love to go on about what a loser their sperm donor is.. my girls are more important.
Friday, April 13, 2012
Friday, April 6, 2012
Update
This will probably be a common title. It is what it is.
So the douchebag sperm donor actually went into CSE (child support enforcement) and took the damn paternity test. A full bloody friggin month to the day for Bella that it was actually court ordered. In my best Maury voice "You ARE the father!"
Psshh.
I didn't need a piece of paper to tell you that.
Of course that just means that he gets to pay more support. Works for me.
Child support is finally being taken out of his paychecks. It's not much but it's something. Another psshhh from me. I'm not spending it. I'm gonna forget it exists that way I won't force myself to rely on it. It can sit there and accumulate and I'll find something totally awesome to spend it on for the girls - kick ass christmas gifts, awesome birthday parties, family vacay, or be sensible and invest in college funds. They are 2 and 3 so no matter what there is time.
Found out where he works. Ran into him. Literally. He was stocking shelves at Walmart. I was looking for something when his presence was brought to my attention. We were 2 feet from him and not once did he acknowledge me or the girls. They did not recognize him. I would be nice and say that's a sad situation but yeah no.. I'm glad. They need a real "daddy" not just a biological sperm donor and he'll never amount to what they need. I thought about texting him later about not saying anything but he asked for no communication and I'm gonna give him what he wants. Let's see how long it'll take until he comes calling around.
As for me.. the quarter is over and I'm glad. Another quarter under my belt with a 4.0. Pretty impressive considering I had 5 classes and one of them I had serious doubts of maintaining an A in.
Now it's time to get ready for my externship. I'm so excited!!! Wonder where I'll go? I hope wherever it is, it is fabulous and I can get a job there.
On a side note, I'm eating Robin's eggs and the blue ones taste like celery. Odd.
So the douchebag sperm donor actually went into CSE (child support enforcement) and took the damn paternity test. A full bloody friggin month to the day for Bella that it was actually court ordered. In my best Maury voice "You ARE the father!"
Psshh.
I didn't need a piece of paper to tell you that.
Of course that just means that he gets to pay more support. Works for me.
Child support is finally being taken out of his paychecks. It's not much but it's something. Another psshhh from me. I'm not spending it. I'm gonna forget it exists that way I won't force myself to rely on it. It can sit there and accumulate and I'll find something totally awesome to spend it on for the girls - kick ass christmas gifts, awesome birthday parties, family vacay, or be sensible and invest in college funds. They are 2 and 3 so no matter what there is time.
Found out where he works. Ran into him. Literally. He was stocking shelves at Walmart. I was looking for something when his presence was brought to my attention. We were 2 feet from him and not once did he acknowledge me or the girls. They did not recognize him. I would be nice and say that's a sad situation but yeah no.. I'm glad. They need a real "daddy" not just a biological sperm donor and he'll never amount to what they need. I thought about texting him later about not saying anything but he asked for no communication and I'm gonna give him what he wants. Let's see how long it'll take until he comes calling around.
As for me.. the quarter is over and I'm glad. Another quarter under my belt with a 4.0. Pretty impressive considering I had 5 classes and one of them I had serious doubts of maintaining an A in.
Now it's time to get ready for my externship. I'm so excited!!! Wonder where I'll go? I hope wherever it is, it is fabulous and I can get a job there.
On a side note, I'm eating Robin's eggs and the blue ones taste like celery. Odd.
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
The Beginning
I had to start over about a year ago. Funny how something like a break up will force your hands into situations you never really pictured yourself.
A year ago I enrolled in Miller-Motte College. I'll be graduating in July. As a medical clinical assistant. It's totally awesome and not where I ever pictured myself. I will be in a growing career field. This means I will be able to take care of my kids. Goal one - check!
I try not to dwell on what the douchebag did to me and the girls. I despise him. I think the bimbo he married is an idiot. She's really young though and I was in her place when I was that age. I was just as much of an idiot with my ex husband. Of course I didn't have any kids with my exhusband and I do have two with the sperm donor aka douchebag aka my kids father. Guess that makes me an idiot for sleeping with him but honestly if it was all a charade I doubt he would have kept it up for 3 years.
Goal 2 is to get a home for me and the girls. Working on that as we speak.
Goal 3 is to teach them to be strong, independent women by being one myself. It's no longer about me. No wallowing in self pity anymore.
I'm sure I'll think of new goals as I go.
A year ago I enrolled in Miller-Motte College. I'll be graduating in July. As a medical clinical assistant. It's totally awesome and not where I ever pictured myself. I will be in a growing career field. This means I will be able to take care of my kids. Goal one - check!
I try not to dwell on what the douchebag did to me and the girls. I despise him. I think the bimbo he married is an idiot. She's really young though and I was in her place when I was that age. I was just as much of an idiot with my ex husband. Of course I didn't have any kids with my exhusband and I do have two with the sperm donor aka douchebag aka my kids father. Guess that makes me an idiot for sleeping with him but honestly if it was all a charade I doubt he would have kept it up for 3 years.
Goal 2 is to get a home for me and the girls. Working on that as we speak.
Goal 3 is to teach them to be strong, independent women by being one myself. It's no longer about me. No wallowing in self pity anymore.
I'm sure I'll think of new goals as I go.
Me
I'm not going to talk about me like I talk about my girls because I don't want this to sound like a dating ad.
I will say this.
I've gotten a lot of crap over the years from a lot of people. I don't always have the best taste in people or the best judgement of character. I make mistakes. I get over it. Life started over for me when I became a mommy. They are the reason I get up in the morning and why I go through what I do. I hate their father. He betrayed my trust and my children the day he walked away. They deserve more. They deserve better. It is my goal to give them that.
I will say this.
I've gotten a lot of crap over the years from a lot of people. I don't always have the best taste in people or the best judgement of character. I make mistakes. I get over it. Life started over for me when I became a mommy. They are the reason I get up in the morning and why I go through what I do. I hate their father. He betrayed my trust and my children the day he walked away. They deserve more. They deserve better. It is my goal to give them that.
Bella
Here is my baby girl! Bella Edie born 2/25/10 6lb 9 oz 19 inch long.
Bella aka Bella Boo aka Bell Bell aka Bells is my garden gnome. She is so petite compared to her sister.. there is almost a full foot of difference in height between the two. Bella is also polar opposites of her sister even though they are the best of friends. Bella is quiet where Kiera is loud. Bella is shy where Kiera knows no strangers. Bella is inquisitive and mechanical. She can't be bothered with petty things like words and such because she's too busy thinking.
She's also a bonafide lefty like her Nana. I forsee many struggles over writing in the future.
Bella has beautiful blonde hair and the biggest chocolate brown eyes. They're old soul eyes and you can get lost in the depths of them. She has NO legs.. no literally of course because then I'd have to carry her everywhere but they are so short in perspective of the rest of her body. She's very silly, has a contagious giggle and likes to be a comedian.
She's hard not to fall in love with.
Bella aka Bella Boo aka Bell Bell aka Bells is my garden gnome. She is so petite compared to her sister.. there is almost a full foot of difference in height between the two. Bella is also polar opposites of her sister even though they are the best of friends. Bella is quiet where Kiera is loud. Bella is shy where Kiera knows no strangers. Bella is inquisitive and mechanical. She can't be bothered with petty things like words and such because she's too busy thinking.
She's also a bonafide lefty like her Nana. I forsee many struggles over writing in the future.
Bella has beautiful blonde hair and the biggest chocolate brown eyes. They're old soul eyes and you can get lost in the depths of them. She has NO legs.. no literally of course because then I'd have to carry her everywhere but they are so short in perspective of the rest of her body. She's very silly, has a contagious giggle and likes to be a comedian.
She's hard not to fall in love with.
Kiera
Introducing Kiera Rose born 8/5/2008 7lbs 13oz 19.75 inches
She is my mini me. At first she was all about her dad.. they were inseparable. Until he kicked us out.
Kiera is super smart - she takes after me. I love that about her. She's now 3.5 and she knows all her numbers, letters, colors, shapes - by sight, not by memorizing them in a song or what have you. She's artistic and creative, loves to sing, great imagination and currently is in love with Mickey Mouse, Strawberry Shortcake, and My Little Ponies. She also loves boats, airplanes, helicopters and big trucks. She's as girly as she is a tomboy. She has a sweet toothy grin, sandy blonde hair and hazel eyes.
We are teaching her how to read and practice her letters. She's right handed like her mama. I think she's gonna take over the world. Oh and she's a Taylor Swift fan - likes to sing along with her songs when they come on the radio.
Pictures to follow.
She is my mini me. At first she was all about her dad.. they were inseparable. Until he kicked us out.
Kiera is super smart - she takes after me. I love that about her. She's now 3.5 and she knows all her numbers, letters, colors, shapes - by sight, not by memorizing them in a song or what have you. She's artistic and creative, loves to sing, great imagination and currently is in love with Mickey Mouse, Strawberry Shortcake, and My Little Ponies. She also loves boats, airplanes, helicopters and big trucks. She's as girly as she is a tomboy. She has a sweet toothy grin, sandy blonde hair and hazel eyes.
We are teaching her how to read and practice her letters. She's right handed like her mama. I think she's gonna take over the world. Oh and she's a Taylor Swift fan - likes to sing along with her songs when they come on the radio.
Pictures to follow.
Nikki
So I'm going out of order but I want to throw in the reason behind my blog - my girls. Here is a brief intro to them.
Nikki aka BrieAnna Nicole Ginger 2/13/04-2/14/04
Yes. You read that right. I had a one day old daughter. She passed from birth defects. I didn't know. I had every stupid test and no one knew. I had her at 38 weeks. She was 4 lbs 5 oz 16 in long. There are baby dolls bigger than she was. I remembered it snowed the day she died. We were at the Chapel Hill children's hospital. I didn't even realize it was Valentine's day until the ride home. Have you ever lost a child? I don't recommend it. It sucks and is the worst possible pain. Don't sit there and tell me it hurts like losing a relative, sibling, spouse or parent. It's not. Your family member had a life. My daughter did not. Am I still bitter about it? Oh yeah. I still get panic attacks when it comes up on her birthday or angelversary. I have to stay sedated the week leading up to those dates. We do balloon releases. Sucks more for my mom though considering they share a birthday.
I'll add photos later.
Nikki aka BrieAnna Nicole Ginger 2/13/04-2/14/04
Yes. You read that right. I had a one day old daughter. She passed from birth defects. I didn't know. I had every stupid test and no one knew. I had her at 38 weeks. She was 4 lbs 5 oz 16 in long. There are baby dolls bigger than she was. I remembered it snowed the day she died. We were at the Chapel Hill children's hospital. I didn't even realize it was Valentine's day until the ride home. Have you ever lost a child? I don't recommend it. It sucks and is the worst possible pain. Don't sit there and tell me it hurts like losing a relative, sibling, spouse or parent. It's not. Your family member had a life. My daughter did not. Am I still bitter about it? Oh yeah. I still get panic attacks when it comes up on her birthday or angelversary. I have to stay sedated the week leading up to those dates. We do balloon releases. Sucks more for my mom though considering they share a birthday.
I'll add photos later.
The End
So it's been a year since goodbyes were said and I was forced to start anew. I found out my boyfriend of three and a half years was cheating on me, used me for what he could, and discarded my kids and me like we were garbage. All the pretty words were gone. He used me to get a new place, pay all the deposits, and took us away from my parents' home - a bloody friggin hour away. After a few weeks of being there he decided that he couldn't handle my lack of a job (although he never once mentioned this was an issue) and that he was ready to call it quits. Come to find out he just wanted to openly screw his assistant manager - a little girl from another store that was a cashier and he transferred to his store as a part of his management. No wonder it only last a couple of months. Of course he did the same to her and he's on to the next one except he married her and knocked her up. More power to the two idiots. If anyone takes in someone who is a cheater and abandons their family then they need a few lessons at the school of hard knocks.
I, on the other hand, had to go back to my parents' house in the hopes they would take us back in. My mom gave me the option to either find a job or go to school. I enrolled in Miller-Motte college as a medical assistant hoping this would give me the opportunity to do right by my girls since their father couldn't be bothered. I got state assistance - food stamps, medicaid, and day care assistance. Don't judge me. I have to do what's best for my girls and this was one way I could.
I, on the other hand, had to go back to my parents' house in the hopes they would take us back in. My mom gave me the option to either find a job or go to school. I enrolled in Miller-Motte college as a medical assistant hoping this would give me the opportunity to do right by my girls since their father couldn't be bothered. I got state assistance - food stamps, medicaid, and day care assistance. Don't judge me. I have to do what's best for my girls and this was one way I could.
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